Jersey Shore: Family Vacation Season 5 Episode 3: Lying or Consequences

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No one likes a liar and people react in different ways to someone who tells lies about them. For example, if someone tells lies about me, such as “oh, El Presidente manipulated the election so that there was no chance he would lose”, or “if El Presidente believes in socialism so much, why does he live in a lavish palace with a harem of beautiful women?” or “my relatives were arrested in the middle of the night and sent to a labor camp in the jungle for daring to speak out publicly against El Presidente’s policies”, I take it very personally and send my secret police to the liars’ homes to teach them why it’s no fun spreading falsehoods. How does MTVs work? Jersey Shore star Vinny Guadagnino deal with liars? That’s what this episode is from Jersey Shore: Family Vacation it’s all about!

Greetings, comrades! I, your El Presidente, am here to report on what even I must admit is the rapidly diminishing entertainment value of the once mighty Jersey Shore. the last episode, Jersey Shore: Family Vacation Season 5 Episode 3 is titled “Hollywood Shore” and focuses on Vinny selling his LA home to move back to the East Coast so he can be with his mom. But the main drama in the episode is about Angelina’s choice to spread lies about Vinny in order to distract her from her own disintegrating personal life.

Jersey Shore: Family Vacation screenshot

During the group brunch hosted by Pauly D last episode, and continues this week, Angelina grows tired of the roommates making fun of her troubled marriage and referring to the videos of her visit to an “sideshow” in Old Bridge, New Jersey that has so many drama caused last season. To take the pressure off herself, Angelina claims to have heard that Vinny “got a girl pregnant.” Loyal as ever, Pauly immediately contacted Vinny, and Angelina’s quasi-estranged husband, Chris, doubled down on the made-up rumor. Vinny wasn’t happy. Ha ha ha ha!

Shortly after, Deena arranges a visit to his house with Angelina and J-Woww, as she feels Vinny must be homesick in LA because he posts more frequently in the roomies’ group chat. When Deena and Angelina arrive and Jenni is waiting for a delayed flight, they discover that Vinny has already sold his house and will be returning to Staten Island the next day.

To make up for Deena who flew across the country for no reason, Vinny takes her and Angelina out for dinner in the lobby of the hotel where he’s staying. There, he confronts Angelina about the rumor, as Angelina continues to insist it’s something she just heard and passed on, even though she admitted to making it up in a confessional earlier in the episode. Vinny tells Angelina they can’t be good friends anymore if she lies about him on camera because he won’t be able to trust her. Angelina responds by trying to wrestle with Vinny, but he doesn’t give in.

That’s basically the entire plot of the episode, which was dragged out in parts due to a lack of other drama. It’s a problem that plagues Jersey Shore: Family Vacation and similar reality shows since the start of the COVID-19 pandemic. With no “standards” for the cast to deal with, the show has to resort to clearly staged storylines to get through it. The problem is compounded by how savvy most of the cast have grown to showcase their personal lives on television, which is why J-Woww and Snooki are now basically supporting characters on the show. With Ronnie on hiatus, that leaves Angelina to carry the show as its one hot mess, and while she’s doing an admirable job, comrades, she’s only human and can’t save the show on her own.

The truth is that the pandemic is causing the decline of Jersey Shore: Family Vacation, and if things don’t change soon, it’s going to be hard to justify another season of this. I’ll give it to the end of the season, comrades, but if people don’t start making fun of me more often for my entertainment, I might have to go to another show! Until next time, amigos: socialism or death!

Posted in: streaming, TV, YouTube | Tagged: Episode 3, Jersey Shore, Jersey Shore: Family Vacation, Mtv, Reality, Season 5

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